These days we read in so many of the social networks the slogan "just be you". I am someone that clearly endorses this truth and encourages others to live from this space as I do myself. Over the years though I have respected tradition I have developed a passion for the truth. One of these truths is the truth of discovering who I really am so that I can live from this reality and not from a pretend one.
As I have continued to undertake this journey I have begun to discover that so many of us, including myself, have a wrong understanding of this. You see many of us think that this "you" is something finite that we work towards and as it reaches an outer perfection we are then able to embrace it and be it.
My question to this approach is if that is the truth then which "you" will you be living from until then?
Will this be a pretend one? Maybe perhaps a temporary and recyclable one until the current one is fixed? Or will you perhaps buy a "you" from the internet or have one made in China?
The reality is that "you" is who you are now. The good the bad and the ugly. You are made up of that part of you that is dark and seedy. You are also made up of that dirty part that shows up when you are feeling weak and low. You also include that good side of you that helps the old ladies cross the street and attempts to love others. Yep, I understand if you might only like the third one but the reality is that all three of them make up the current you. Ignoring the first two will mean that you cant be you. Pretending that they are not there will mean never being able to discover the real you or worst yet live and be the real "you".
You see what needs to happen here is for you and me to start embracing the three together at the same time. This will mean embracing you and embracing who God embraces right now. As you do this your awareness will grow and your understanding will deepen. You will be able to see that in order to be freed from something unhealthy you have to first accept it, own it, and only then you will be able to let it go so that you can discover something new, healthier, and true about yourself within your heart. Once this process is on its way, and believe me when I tell you that it is not easy at all to do, the shame, guilt, and condemnation that prevent you from being you will begin to dissolve. So will the illusions built by your ego which you thought were the goals that needed to be achieved in order to be happy and at peace. Suddenly you will find yourself in a new journey within you where you will give yourself permission to discover the real you with no end result in mind. And at the same time, you will give God permission to show you, that he loves you as you are and not as he hopes you will be one day.
Now, normally I am asked if there is a picture in the Bible that shows what this may look like practically. Well, the good news is that there is one and it pertains to a story that takes place after the resurrection.
Mary Magdalene was the first one to see Yeshua after his resurrection. Naturally, and as all of us would, she tries to grab him. Yeshua responds by telling her not to cling to him. For many years I was puzzled by this response from Yeshua as it struck me as cold and distant. Yet today I see something totally different. You see up until he is crucified Mary Magdalene, like the rest of his followers, had experienced Yeshua in a physical form also known as finite. This enabled them to feel him, hug him, hold him, and vice versa. Yet now in his resurrection body, he appears to her in his infinite form yet Mary Magdalene's response is still the same as if he was still in the flesh. I, therefore, believe that what Yeshua was trying to say to her was, "Mary you have to let go of your finite and limited experience of me so you can now experience the infinite me in spirit and truth within your heart."
I believe this is a powerful picture for all of us to see that if we are ever going to discover our true selves in Christ, we need to first understand that this is something that is found beyond our finite selves we try so hard to change. This is because this space within us cannot be accessed by trying to fix and decorate our finite lives. In fact, is this self-attempt to improve ourselves that is often the reason why we fail to notice and find the pearl hidden within us. Embracing what is broken in us creates vulnerability in our lives which is the number one antidote against the shame that binds all of us, and prevents us from seeing further.
I know in my own life as I look back I realize that all the stinging was caused by the clinging I did out of the unawareness that everything I needed to live a peaceful and happy life God had already placed within my heart.
We need to understand that without this process we will have very little chance to embrace that part of us that cannot be held and see further than what meets the eye. This is because it is impossible to understand who we truly are and who God truly is as one cannot understand what one cannot see.
So consider today choosing to stop focusing on what you wish was different which makes you think that only then life would be happy and good. Consider that true happiness and peace are not something that is affected by sudden changes or what may or may not be happening around you. Consider that these show up and remain in our lives when our focus is on what is good and true about our lives and that this truth can only be found and experienced from within. In that place called our hearts where God has hidden our infinite and true identity together with His infinite Kingdom.
Finally, it is very important for us to appreciate that our walk with God is meant to be an evolving experience, and not one that remains stuck in a situation, project, or even revelation. This is why Yeshua probably told the three after the transfiguration episode had taken place to move on as he had much more to show them.
It is clear that they had much more to see and so do we.
-pablo-